Thursday, August 21, 2014

Decisions Decisions

It's been a crazy 8+ years with this running thing.
It truly has.
I started running because I was gaining weight rapidly with no provocation so I tried to fix it the best way I knew how and that was throw some kind of different exercise in there (I was a gym rat) to help.  But I needed so much sleep (and very little food; no really, I was NEVER hungry), that I couldnt keep up.
And then after several different doctors they told me what was wrong and we began fixing it.
Fast forward to the next few years and I was running all the runs, meeting all the peoples and at times running myself and my body into the ground (having had to stop a few times to recover from an injury or two).
Then I got all crazy and went off rail and really ramped up the long distance running with 3 marathons within 99 days (except I had to drop to the half in one just so I could in fact keep running and finish the last one of the 3)
I got thin, buff, and strong.  I was in the best shape of my life and managed to stay in great shape until...
So 2 years there give or take, gaining some weight, losing some fitness, but hanging on for dear life to my running love..
And here I find myself back home in this great State and enjoying everything life has to give.
I'm back running normally, just a bit slower than I use to, losing the weight, gaining back some of the fitness.  All great things.  Great and wonderful things.
But I am also spending a lot of time in the gym.  It has always been my first love, and I have figured out, my aging body responds very well to what I do to it in the gym.  Plus I spend a lot of time with my family there as well.  So its a win-win.
Additionally I am finding it harder and harder to fit in the running with the time I like to spend in the gym.
I am sore a lot from lifting and pushing all the heavy things.  Not a horrible sore, but a sore that makes you go gah! I don't wanna run because running hurts.
But I do want to finish what I've started because well, I love bling :O)  And plus I kinda made some commitments to others and to myself that I want to see through as I said.
Its not that I don't love running anymore, I do.  What I am finding is that quite honestly, I just don't love it like I use to love it.  Where once I thought I was just done with the full marathons, I might actually be done with half marathons too.
Except I have 4 more bought and paid for.  Thankfully 3 of them are within 4 weeks of each other and then that will be over.  And honestly 1 of those I probably will end up not doing (Miami).  With me getting in at $35 I won't lose my shit over it and paying almost $450 for an airline ticket and a hotel for 2 nights...well, I dont know.  Seemed like a good idea at the time (not just the cost, but I signed up when I was in the middle of the polar vortex up in NE and ANYTHING WARM sounded like the best thing since sliced bread).
I am not saying that I won't ever do another half marathon, because I think thats delusional.  But after this cycle of races, I am going to do 1 a year, maybe 2.  October and January.  Or January and February.  Depends.
I plan to keep my running to a minimum, a couple of days a week 3-4 miles, and run 5-6 on the weekend throughout the Summer of 2015 and probably into September (still technically Summer) then I can decide whether or not I will run Houston again.  This will keep me in shape enough to where I can go out and run a 5K or 10K because I do love the Spring racing season in Houston.  Plus I have already signed up for 1 of the 6 Houston race series (that has a race at different local hotspots).  Registration is only open for the New Years Day race (10K) at this time so of course I signed up the first day for the deeply discounted rate.

Honestly outside of the yearly Houston half marathon in January, well that just seems good enough to me you know?  We shall see.  I will have to enter the lottery next year for it, then I will have my 5 years at the half so I will have guaranteed entry from then on out if I want it.
Or maybe I will take up volunteering at races more than actually running them.
While I did have a 'break' while living in NE, it wasnt really.  Sure I didnt run or train like before, but I still trained for freaking Chicago and a few halfs and that shit ain't easy to do up there.
I couldnt WAIT to be back so I could run and train etc.  And sure I have SO enjoyed it, but I am enjoying so much more now.  There is so much to life, and I wasted so much of it on various things throughout my life, some bad, some good.
Now, as I've left and returned...and yes gotten older and had some true one on one time with myself up there.  Well things just aren't what they appear sometimes.
That goes for a lot of things to be honest.
So yeah, I want to spend more time in the gym, more time enjoying the simple act of running, not feeling pressure to do it or having to do it.  I want to do things that bring true joy to my life.  Things I smile about days afterwards.
So there you have it.
I'm gonna get through this training cycle, get a few more blingy blings for my wall and then just chillax.
Its gonna be great!
And....before I go, there might be something I have on my bucket list for late 2015 and has NOTHING to do with running.  But does require a lot of hard work, perseverance and dedication.
I'm still pondering it...

1 comment:

Mel said...

Smiles. do what makes you happy.

I've never been a run all of the time gal, but i've had to scale back against my will in the last 2 years. Now I am realizing everything happens for a reason and it's ok. I've found other things that make me happy. Although a PR on the half would make me happy too, but at what cost?